Guide request

[jazmine928]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
I understand that the self we commonly identify as, is just a made up story that is useful for living within the confines on society, but has no inherent reality of its own

What are you looking for at LU?
I feel as though I already have a good understanding of this, but could be more embodied in this way. I have a lot of background knowledge and self practice but I love the idea of working with a guide to help me go deeper

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
I’d love to be guided with questions to get me to sort of see for myself that the self is not actually there. I like the idea of working with another person who has gone through this process and can help me understand my own experience

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
Lots of meditation, tons of reading, retreats, Buddhism, non duality..I’ve been on the hamster wheel for a while

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self? 10

[Elad]

Hello, my name is Elad and I would be happy to do this exploration with you, if we see that it makes sense.I really like your formulation "to be open for an honest and loving exchange". Please read and respond to the following points.

1. During this process we will attend only to your own direct experience. We will not be discussing theories or beliefs or other methods, including from non-duality and etc. I will ask you questions and give exercises and you will look and answer me from your direct experience.

2. The two most important ingredients in this process are your wish to see what is true and your willingness to look deeply at questions, give wholehearted engagement to experiments/exercises presented to you, and report your experience here with 100% honesty.

3. Please read the following documents from LU *carefully* and let me know or ask questions if you have any reservations or doubts regarding them:


http://liberationunleashed.com/disclaimer-2

And:

http://liberationunleashed.com/about/faq/#faq-1041


4. For the process to be focused and fruitful, I like to make an agreement that both guide and client (i.e you and me if we do this together) respond on this thread every day, and in the case of special circumstances where we cannot, still touch space here on the thread to say so, the day before or on the day. In the same spirit, I work with people who have the motivation and availability to make this process a primary priority in their life for the duration of the cooperation. If any of this does not fit your life rhythm, style or preferences, please let me know and another guide will work with you.

5. This process is not about uncovering or resolving/getting help with shadow material. It is also not an open-ended place to discus different perspectives on life and look for answers to big questions. That might happen indirectly, but the process is focused only on recognizing that there is no separate self in control of things. Knowing that, are you still motivated for this process?

[jazmine928]

Hi Elad,
Thank you so much for responding to my request for a guide! I would love to work with you and feel very committed. I read all of the disclaimers and don't have any concerns about my well being and ability to do this sort of work. I love the idea of having to put everything aside in regard to spirituality/seeking and I know this is something I need to do as I've become so saturated with it all. The only concern I have is about being able to check in daily next week...I will be on a trip with my husband and I'm not sure I'll have a computer with me. Could I use my phone to check in on the app? Thanks again for taking me on!

Best,
Jessica

[Elad]

Hi Jessica, lovely! You can read and answer messages over your phone through the phones internet browser. That being said, it's also fine you don't answer some days the next week. We can make exceptions, as long as we do our best and communicate. It's all about the spirit of the letter, not the letter ;) Okay, let's start:

Looking only in direct experience - not beliefs and stories and rationalizations - is there a Jessica anywhere?

If yes, what/where?

If no, let that sink in. What does it evoke?

[jazmine928]

Hi Elad,

When I look at my experience, I can tell there isn't a "Jessica" per say, but definitely a strong feeling of "Me." there is also a familiarity with myself...what my body feels like, my preferences, beliefs, ways of behaving, etc. There is a sense of continuity...

Also, should I be putting all "spirituality" books aside during this process?

Have a great day :)

[Elad]

Hi Elad,

When I look at my experience, I can tell there isn't a "Jessica" per say, but definitely a strong feeling of "Me." there is also a familiarity with myself...what my body feels like, my preferences, beliefs, ways of behaving, etc. There is a sense of continuity...

Also, should I be putting all "spirituality" books aside during this process?

Have a great day :)

Hi Jessica!

Look closely and deeply at this "strong feeling of me". What is it? A belief? A sensation? Something else? Really really look and don't accept habitual beliefs for an answer.

On a relative level you will (fortunately) not lose touch with the familiarity with yourself, just like you won't forget the streets in your city or how to count. We are not looking to get rid of any normal familiarity and functioning, only to get clear about if there is in fact any real self driving any of it, if a separate self is need for any of this to function freely and naturally.

Regarding books, do you have an intuition about it? By and large it might be great to spend every moment where you could be reading instead inquiring about what it is that is being assumed to be a self or agent. But if some book feels very supportive for this for you, we can talk about it and let it be a part... This is process will have a unique version that will be yours (yes, paradoxical).

[jazmine928]

My intuition says I need to STOP with all the books. Even my body/brain is sort of feeling saturated with all the talk of this stuff. At least for now I'm going to put it aside. I'll investigate this "myself" feeling and get back to you!

[Elad]

My intuition says I need to STOP with all the books. Even my body/brain is sort of feeling saturated with all the talk of this stuff. At least for now I'm going to put it aside. I'll investigate this "myself" feeling and get back to you!

Great 🙏

[jazmine928]

Hi Elad,
This feeling of being me feels like a sensation..an energy perhaps. I've always been a very embodied person starting classical ballet at a young age, getting into exercise, yoga etc. So my body feels like "me" too. I think sometimes of feeling of being alive gets mixed up with thoughts and together they become "me". Not sure if this makes any sense...I just feel like me! lol

[Elad]

Hi Elad,
This feeling of being me feels like a sensation..an energy perhaps. I've always been a very embodied person starting classical ballet at a young age, getting into exercise, yoga etc. So my body feels like "me" too. I think sometimes of feeling of being alive gets mixed up with thoughts and together they become "me". Not sure if this makes any sense...I just feel like me! lol

Hi Jessica! We often call beliefs feelings. What we call feeling is often some sensations plus a a belief that it is a certain feeling and a belief that it is "our" feeling.

Now please look at this "feeling of me".

Does the sensations by themselves say "we are Jessica" or are they just sensations?

Really feel and look, remember the discovery is in direct experience, not analysis.

[jazmine928]

Hi Elad,
Sorry for being absent the last few days. We were traveling and even had a major disruption in our plan! My husband and I were supposed to fly to Portugal and there was an issue with our passports and we weren’t allowed on the plane! It’s been interesting to see how my mind is still trying to catch up to what happened and a feeling of “I can’t believe this happened to ME!” It’s been good practice.

I’ve noticed that yes, there is a strong belief that my body, emotions, memories, likes and dislikes make up this sense of “me.”

I have started reading a book by John Troy (wisdoms soft whisper) and I loved the pointer of “you are the one that listens when you talk to yourself” that felt very direct. I can sense this presence but i can’t ever really put my finger on it. Thanks again for your willingness to guide me 😊

[Elad]

Hi Elad,
Sorry for being absent the last few days. We were traveling and even had a major disruption in our plan! My husband and I were supposed to fly to Portugal and there was an issue with our passports and we weren’t allowed on the plane! It’s been interesting to see how my mind is still trying to catch up to what happened and a feeling of “I can’t believe this happened to ME!” It’s been good practice.

I’ve noticed that yes, there is a strong belief that my body, emotions, memories, likes and dislikes make up this sense of “me.”

I have started reading a book by John Troy (wisdoms soft whisper) and I loved the pointer of “you are the one that listens when you talk to yourself” that felt very direct. I can sense this presence but i can’t ever really put my finger on it. Thanks again for your willingness to guide me 😊

Oh, sounds like an ordeal! Well done to make good use of it for practice.

I thought you said you don't want to read until we finish this process?

Now that you have though (... :D ....): what is it that listens? That which listens does it have a location or boundaries?

Good you see it is a BELIEF that feelings and etc. are a self. I.e. its NOT a direct experience.

Please do the following exercise:

[Elad]

“I” labelling

Get a sheet of paper and draw a line that divides that sheet in half. Label one half 'self' and the other side 'other'. Sit down and start a timer for 5 minutes. Every time you have a thought make a mark on the sheet. If that thought is about the self put a mark on the self side, if it’s about something else, mark the other side. If a thought about food occurs due to feeling hungry, mark that on the self side. Any thought that refers back to a self should go on the self side. (I'm bored, I'm tired, is the door locked (my safety) that video was funny (I was amused), my back hurts, I am frightened) get it?
Let me know how you go and what you notice.

[jazmine928]

Hi Elad!
I just did the exercise. I have a good amount of time this week as I’m a teacher and we have no school. This was in interesting activity because when thoughts popped up that I thought belonged on the “other” side, they were actually referring back to the self. For example “this house is a gross mess.” At first I thought it was “other” but I realized it was just my opinion. Lots of thoughts about planning and preferences, my back actually does hurt 😂. Thoughts about how I should be visiting my sister in Portugal. Basically the thoughts all pointed back to “self”

[Elad]

Hi Elad!
I just did the exercise. I have a good amount of time this week as I’m a teacher and we have no school. This was in interesting activity because when thoughts popped up that I thought belonged on the “other” side, they were actually referring back to the self. For example “this house is a gross mess.” At first I thought it was “other” but I realized it was just my opinion. Lots of thoughts about planning and preferences, my back actually does hurt 😂. Thoughts about how I should be visiting my sister in Portugal. Basically the thoughts all pointed back to “self”

Great observing there! :D Continue to this exercise:

Mind labelling experience

Here is an exercise which examines the way in which the mind labels experience - it takes about 20 minutes and you will need a pen a paper.
This exercise is broken into 10 minute lots. For each 10 minute period pay attention to any bodily sensation ie is there any tightening, or any relaxing?
For the first ten minutes write down what you are experiencing right now using the word “I”.
For example: I am sitting on a chair, I am hearing a clock ticking, I am looking at a computer screen, I am feeling hungry. Get right to the point, no past or future fantasy, just a plain description of your experience right here and now.
Then for the next ten minutes continue writing down what you are experiencing but this time without using the word “I”. Just describe the experience as it is happening using verbs. For example: sitting on a chair, typing, breathing, blinking, hearing the clock. (Again, watch what is happening in the body.)
At the end of the twenty minutes compare the two ways in which the experience was labelled and answer the following four questions:

1. Is one truer than the other, and If so, which one?
2. What is here without labels?
3. Do labels affect the experience or just describe it?
4. Did you notice any differences in the body?