Can't tell if 'I'm' there yet

[Anastacia42]

Here they are. Your answers will be shared with other guides, who may have questions.


1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Describe decision & give examples from experience.

Describe intention & give examples from experience.

Describe free will & give examples from experience.

Describe choice & give examples from experience.

Describe control & give examples from experience.

What makes things happen? How does it work?

What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

6) Anything to add?

Loving,

[inthewoods]

Hi Stacy,

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

There is no separate self, me or I anywhere, in any way, and there never was.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

The separate self is thoughts that feel like me. The sense of self starts up whenever I am in direct experience and it distracts me out of direct experience. A single thought can lead to a chain reaction of thoughts that lasts a long time. The process repeats constantly. Sometimes this sense of self is a thought that feels like me. Other times, it feels like there are two thoughts moving in parallel. A thought with content and another thought that flows along beside it that feels like me or like the knower of thought.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

It feels sort of weightless and freeing and peaceful. Very contented. Free from worry and free from the future and the past.

This dialogue has helped me to clarify quite a lot. The frequent intense looking exercises produced very clear and certain seeing which has helped to reduce doubt by 99%. For some reason, over the past few days I've also been able to drop into very deep and focused meditative states very quickly and easily.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

The thing that pushed me over actually happened before I began this dialogue. This happened a number of months ago. I had been meditating and doing inquiry and had had some glimpses. Then one evening, my wife was quite upset with me about something and we were having a discussion about that, and I was feeling upset about it. I was standing in the living room as she walked away and I just felt the world go kachunk. In a second, the world looked completely different in one way and completely the same in another. It felt less separate and like my perspective had changed. This has been a permanent change ever since. It felt like a big deal, but because everything was also so unchanged in a certain way, I still felt a lot of doubt.

5) Describe decision & give examples from experience.

Decision can't be found, as is illustrated by the palm flipping exercise.

Describe intention & give examples from experience.

Intention is a thought. It is other than direct experience of the now.

Describe free will & give examples from experience.

I will do what I am most motivated to do in every situation, but I have no control over my thoughts/wants that lead to this motivation. I have no free will.

Describe choice & give examples from experience.

I have no choice. I am going to do what I am going to do.

Describe control & give examples from experience.

I have no control over my own actions. I have no control over anyone else's actions and I have no control over the world. I have absolutely no control.

What makes things happen? How does it work?

Things just happen as they are going to happen based on all the things that happened before.

What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

I am going to do exactly what I am going to do in any situation and have no choice or control over that. I am not responsible for anything.

6) Anything to add?

Shely, I would just like to express my gratitude to you for how you've helped me gain such clarity in such a short period of time. I am also really grateful to LU as a whole for what it is and what it does and all the people that make it so.

Thank you,

John

[Anastacia42]

Join, this is great. Happy to help. I call it creating world peace - one mind at a time.

Your answers will be shared with other guides who may have questions. Stay tuned.

Loving

[inthewoods]

Hi Stacy

Happy to help. I call it creating world peace - one mind at a time.

Amazing. Thanks again for your generosity!

[Anastacia42]

You're welcome! It has been a pleasure.

Loving,