I did this exercise for different choices made throughout the day (in addition to selecting something to eat or drink in the fridge).“Please go to the fridge and take out some food or drink. Watch like a hawk.”
Each time there are both thoughts about making a decision (e.g. “Should I watch TV or should I not watch TV?”) as well as the real decision which is manifest by the action that’s actually taken by the body (e.g. in the previous example it is “not watching TV”.)“How is a decision is made?”
Thoughts about the decision show up by themselves. The decision making process leading to the real decision is unobserved.
No one is making thoughts about deciding appear. Similarly, what leads the body to take a particular action (ie. what’s making the real decision) is not experienced.“WHAT is making the decision?”
“During the day when there is a seeming choosing or decision making is happening, look for the exact moment when choosing happening.”
When a decision is seemingly made, no one can be found behind thoughts like “I am sure now…this is my decision”. The thoughts and the knowing appear simultaneously.“Is there a chooser at ANY time?”
“Please put the attention on the ‘sense of control’. Do this as many times as possible during the day and inquire:”N : “Even without an "I", a decision is also associated with a sense of control.”
It’s a combination of thoughts about making a decision and a sensation.“How the ‘sense of control’ is experienced?” “What is it made of?”
The sensation itself is located in the area from the head to the chest. As for thoughts, there is just the awareness of them. They do not appear in a particular location.“Where is its location?”
Thoughts are not owned by anybody. They just appear.“What is owning this ‘sense of control’?”
No one has ownership over the sensation from head to chest.
There is no direct experience of “having a sense of control”. There are just thoughts appearing spontaneously and a sensation that is not owned by anybody.“What is having a ‘sense of control’?”