Thank you for pointing me back to our discussion in May. My problem with direct experience, I think, was not that I don't trust it, but I guess it's such an unfamiliar state of being, I feel much more comfortable in the world of thoughts. And here doing this practice my sense sometimes was that the message was that thoughts were the 'baddies' and actual experience was the 'goodies', the good place we wanted to get to by recognizing how bad the other place was.
But the way I see it now is rather that actual experience is also for us a method - through discovering AE I come to realize things about the workings of what I call 'me'. It doesn't necessarily mean that one is bad and the other is good. So reading your guidance from earlier was helpful. I'll try to bear this in mind throughout the practice, and if I do slip back, that's because thinking habits as you know are very strong and deeply ingrained. It's not because I don't 'trust' this process. On the contrary! What I wrote last night in my question to you, about people not responding when I raise the subject of no-self, I was actually quite astonished to see this, because suddenly I felt that I had gone such a long way since I started doing this practice with you. So it might seem that it hasn't resulted in much, but actually I think there are huge results already, and I'm only scraping the surface still. So thank you and please don't give up on me :-)
Sounds like a Zen koan but I guess that if there really were a me then AE would show me that there is a me, whereas it has been showing me the opposite.If there were a you then looking at AE would teach you that there is NO YOU to be taught. :) Can you see this?
Yes I can.AE cannot confirm the above, since all the above just assumed by thoughts.
It’s just a conceptual overlay on the actual experience. Can you see this?