No, only the illusion that gets stronger than longer u are paying into it.1) Is there a 'me', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
the illution of a separate self comes from believing that there is a controller, a doer how is in charge of thoughts and feelings. When a thought arises, the "I" claims to be the thinker of the thought, when feelings arise the "I" claims to be the one who is feeling the feeling. It starts as soon as a thought arises and the "I" identifying with it. than the "I" is arguing about it, feeling happy about the thought or dislikes the thought. but in reality the thought arises on its own, the identification habbit happens on its own and the feelings of liking/disliking happening on its own. everything can be observed. no one in control.2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works.
This Identifying with thoughts and feelings couses a lot of stress, so seeing this identification gives the chance to just let thoughts be thoughts and feelings be feelings. things feel lighter, not much urge to react to every thought or feeling. Feeling freed of the chains of thoughts.3) How does it feel to see this?
Lets say u just woke up in the morning and coz its a monday u have to go to work. So there might be a thought of "i have to go to work". now there are two ways of experience this thought (and all thoughts). The first one is what normaly happens: u have the feeling of "I have to go to work" just how u experiencing it always. u have the feeling that u where thinking the thought, and therefore u identified urself with it.4) How would you describe it to somebody who is very interested, but has never heard about this illusion.
But if there is a closer look at that thought it can be seen that this thought just appeared on its own, out of habbit, out of chance, without anyone how asket for it to come. the thought just arosed on its own. And that thought can be watched like a tree or a sunrise can be watched.
Through all the thinking like "i am..." , "i have to....", "i like..." and the unconcious identification with these thoughts there is the illusion of "I" created. If one would put infront of these thinking habbits "there is the thought arising:" and than "I am..." there would be a more realistic, less ego based view of things.
Seeing throught this illusion is like taking a step back and watch thoughts and feelings without beeing involved in them.
the process of seeing through the illusion began already 8 years ago when beeing on Mahasi Retreat. So also now a lot of things are seen clearer there is still work to do to life that truth. The same as the thought process is an ongoing process, also the detachment from it is an ongoing process. at least for "me" at the moment.5) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
peace+love. Stefan
