Equanimity

[Shado]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
The self is a fabrication of the mind, identity, thoughts about 'me', who am I, as a person, who has a story in time and space, who was born and is going to die, and is separate from others and the world. That is the belief, that is not present here anymore. Selfing happens still in some levels, in emotions or in felt body sense, in reactions.

What are you looking for at LU?
I'm looking for deepening of realization or working with someone who understands and has clear insight, with some layers or reactions or perceptions that are still operating in this body-mind-consciousness. Also, I'm interested to guide and help others, and I want experience in that.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
Being present with someone, being open and vulnerable, and getting another perspective to my issues. Connection, sharing. I have been watching a lot of nonduality videos, and conversations and how other people are guided, it is familiar to me. I guess my goal is to reveal my mechanisms, that are still operating unconsciously, and personal guidance would help with that.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
I had spontanious awakening 2013, after that I started to meditate, read information, spiritual teachings, do yoga etc. After the wonderful honeymoon period there was a long dark night of the soul. I didn't do shadow work or trauma work before awakening, so there has been a lot to purge, very physical emotion work, kundalini energy work etc. And also inquiry, there was seeking after I felt I lost the clear insight, and exhausting the seeking energy, deepening of insights, emptiness.. Lately there has been some nondual experiences, and I have done inquiry into the sense fields. Meditation is kind of an ongoing practice moment to moment.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self? 11

[warissem]

Hi Shado

We apologize for our late response to your post.

I am here to help you see through the illusion of a separate self. It is helpful to understand the process intellectually as you do and to have experiences about this stuff.

The point is to be what you already are, present and aware.
Can you be not present here now?
Can you be unaware?
But thoughts are coming saying : it is not IT, I don't feel like those I heard on audios or I watched on videos or I read on books. Seeking means that there is A GOAL to reach in some future. The point for you is to SEE that "what is sought", this goal is THAT which is seeing (or is aware) of thoughts like all what is said in your introduction.

The illusion is in thoughts saying : I am a person, an individual separate from the world and others. Here in this forum, we are going to look to this "I" which is pretending to be a person, a separate individual and wants enlightenment.

If what is said above resonates with you, let me know. I suggest for you to marinate what is said above and come back with your insights.
Some agreements to be followed during our dialog :
Come to the forum once a day to look at my posts or post your answers.
Learn to use the quote function.
Be 100% honest in your answers : the answer must be given through your deep conviction.

Best for you

Nour