Freeformation

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Sandraja
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Oct 18, 2020 10:09 pm

Freeformation

Postby Sandraja » Sun Oct 18, 2020 10:15 pm

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?

Feeling free of the feelings that belong to the do-er. I feel every experience is a projection of the illusion of self. In the deepest core of being there is only love/oneness and to realise that to the fullest we have to let go of everything that is not that. There is no stable something in the core of me except for that

What are you looking for at LU?

I am feeling somehow stuck in my proces. There is this message I get in ceremonies that I can not move on in my process of letting go because my environment is not ready to cary me in my proces. I feel I am here to help others to move on and I can only continue when that is done. I am not sure if that is just a protectionmechanism not to go further in my own process or based on something truthfull. It makes me sad and I do feel a longing to move myself to the next thing and let go of the illusion of self . I am so tired of this endless play that we call life.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?

Questions that make me able to go deeper in the process and realise stuff I can not so easily do by myself. I think I would be helped more by a loving approach more than a tough one which for me does not meen you can not be very direct. I totally get out of contact or irritated when others are forcing their truth on my. i need space to process deeply and that sometimes takes some time.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?

I ve been searching for truth since as long as I can remember. Did my first ayahuasca when I was 23 done a lot of meditation practices, psychedelics, read a lot done courses, workshops etc. I feel its very difficult to find places where I can still go deeper. A lot of times I ve been switching rolls with the person guiding me energetically and groupdynamics get disturbed because I am not taking up the roll I should being leading the group instead of participating. I somehow still feel resistence to start things myself. Not sure if that is fear or something else. it feels like a lack of motivation to put the effort. I tend to do things on my own now cause it seems less complicated. Ive been doing psychedelics by myself for example but I still feel I could be growing more in contact with others. Maybe that is what I am feeling that I would be able to with peopel being on the same level or higher than me ( just using the word higher here for clarity purposes). I am loosing motivation sometimes for reaching for goals on the level of form. Thats why I feel I need to move on in a way too.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
8

Bananafish
Posts: 3631
Joined: Mon Dec 08, 2014 3:29 pm
Location: Japan
Contact:

Re: Freeformation

Postby Bananafish » Tue Oct 20, 2020 7:40 pm

Hi Sandraja. :) My name is Kento.
I'd be glad to accompany you, if that's ok for you?


If you're ready, let's get straight into the issue of the illusion of separate self.
Please tell where you are currently at regarding this topic, and what your aim (if any) is.
Also, please tel me bit more about your expectations on this dialogue.


Warm regards,

Kento
I'm available for Skype or Zoom face to face conversation. Drop me a line and we could arrange
the date.
Email: swinganova@hotmail.co.jp
Website: https://en.modernkoanproject.com

User avatar
Sandraja
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Oct 18, 2020 10:09 pm

Re: Freeformation

Postby Sandraja » Wed Oct 21, 2020 2:36 pm

Hi Kento,
On the level of form I have a strong conviction that my self and the needs I have can not be met in the world as I experience it somehow. On another level I believe that everything is created by an illusion of the mind and there is no seperate I and no seperate world. The last option is more comforting than scary for me on a concious level at this point. Let me know when would suit you for meeting.
Kind Regards
Sandra

Bananafish
Posts: 3631
Joined: Mon Dec 08, 2014 3:29 pm
Location: Japan
Contact:

Re: Freeformation

Postby Bananafish » Wed Oct 21, 2020 3:32 pm

Hi Sandra, thanks for the reply!


You might have overlooked my question ... I asked:
What is your aim or expectation from this dialogue?


Would you like to try zoom sessions?

I'd be free around 4AM JST both on weekdays and weekend.
I could set some other time period for a session on Sundays.
Where do you live, and what is your timezone?


Best wishes,


Kento
I'm available for Skype or Zoom face to face conversation. Drop me a line and we could arrange
the date.
Email: swinganova@hotmail.co.jp
Website: https://en.modernkoanproject.com


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