Thank you for the encouragement. I'm still quite ill today so it's been hard to concentrate again. I'm getting really frustrated with it all. Anyway I did what you said. Here's a few of the exercise I did.
Smells- cinnamon, herbes de provence, smoked paprika
No, I have no control over the smells’ appearance or its quality. It simply appears as is.Are you making smells appear or is it showing up on its own?
Totally uncontrollable; I can try to mix and match the smells, but it’s no good. I have no control over the odour as it arises.Is the smell controllable? Can you adjust smell to your liking?
Can you have a different odour than what is appearing in this very moment?
Smoked paprika- smells slightly burned, tangy, nostril-stinging, reminds me of crisps, smells warm strangelyDescribe the smell in as many words as you can. How description and experience differ?
Herbs- smells like plants or a greenhouse, slightly pungent, smells like the outdoors
Cinnamon- very sweet, tingly, smells how it tastes,
It’s hard just to experience the smell without thinking about it. Thoughts are so automatic. I can choose the words I use to describe the smells, but I cannot choose the quality of the smell itself; it’s not open to change or revision. Smells can be pleasant or unpleasant, but the words used to describe, in and of themselves, are not. Words are just noises, signifiers.
Yes, but they are still 2 distinct things.Can you see that both experience of smell and description arise as a simultaneous happening?
That thought is detached from experience; but description is tied to experience in that its purpose is to communicate experience.What do you notice from this investigation?
No it’s appearing on its own.Are you making taste appear or is it showing up on its own?
No, I have no choice about the taste in my mouth; it is what it is.Is taste controllable? Can you adjust taste to your liking?
Can you have a different taste than what is appearing in this very moment?
Smooth, strong and sour aftertaste, rich, tangy,Describe the taste in as many words as you can. How description and experience differ?
Actual experience has a real impact on my experience; description is just a series of labels created to communicate the experience. Both are spontaneous (I don’t control the words that pop into my head) and experience, of course, influences description but they are 2 separate and distinct appearances.
Yes, one naturally and always accompanies the other but they are still separate things.Can you see that both experience of taste and description arise as a simultaneous happening?
That thoughts are separate from experience. Thoughts are there to communicate experience but they’re not the real thing.What do you notice from this investigation?
I do absolutely nothing; thoughts just arise like sounds or sights. I have no control over them.What do you do in order to think?
I don’t. Thoughts birth themselves without warning.How do you make (or birth) a thought into existence?
Probably not a lot to go on there but I did try really hard. Hopefully I can concentrate better tomorrow.