Some nudges are more than welcome.

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khuyen
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Apr 20, 2020 11:36 pm

Some nudges are more than welcome.

Postby khuyen » Mon Apr 20, 2020 11:43 pm

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
It's like the horizon. It's not real, but it's kind of real as the place where the sky and earth meets (I'm aware I'm speaking in metaphor, but yes)

What are you looking for at LU?
I read the Gateless Gate and something got clarified. Experiences are real. Thoughts, sensations, feelings, this keyboard, this screen, all are real. Just like the earth is real, but the horizon is not real, the "content" of life is real but the container or owner of the experiences is not.

As such, I'm looking for pointers for direct awareness that comes from.

Also, "I" still have some doubts sometimes. Where am "I" in the understanding of "no self"?
Writing this, a slight nervousness is coming up, feels like asking for reassurance.
What do you expect from a guided conversation?
Honestly, a sense of assurance, perhaps an experiential slap in the face or confirmation like "wait, I've been suspecting this non-self for a while" (the letter "I" was written intentionally, as a convention. There is this interesting hesitation and pause upon the decision to use "I"). Could someone give a nudge?

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
I have always been a philosophical child, and studied philosophy in college out of the inclination to ask the obvious question.
My mother is a Buddhist nun, and I have been mentored by people with strong spiritual practices.
I began meditating on and off in 2012. I have had some experiences I'd call a kind of samadhi.
I went to a 10 day vipassana in 2018 after some nudges from other mentors. I wasn't seeking much then, had a few moments of deep openness and the clarity after it.

I have been a huge self-improvement junkie. No shame, aha.
During one of the dark nights of the soul 6 years ago when I locked myself indoor for a week for self-inquiry, I accidentally listened to a talk by Alan Watts "What if there is no self to improve?" I remember the feeling of disorientation and liberation at the same time. "who am I?" "I can be anyone. I am no one".

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
10

User avatar
SeeEye
Posts: 246
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 7:02 pm

Re: Some nudges are more than welcome.

Postby SeeEye » Tue Apr 21, 2020 5:40 pm

Hi,

We can walk together for a while, provided that you are ok with the setup here, which is:

-I ask you questions, you look into them and work with them as best you can.
-Be as direct as possible, as too much background, thoughting and multiple compound questions make this confusing.
-Be honest. What you are experiencing, your emotions, all good.
-What we are looking into is seeing...direct experience, not content of thoughts, past and what most consider therapy.
-You are healthy and balanced enough to do this work. Please read the following disclaimer and acknowledge for me...
http://www.liberationunleashed.com/register/disclaimer/

Please use the quote feature, so this is easy to follow and makes sense. Cut my question, then answer, like I did below for Q2.

1) Would you please tell me about what you expect from seeing no-self? What do you want from this?

2) I like the Watts quote. Where are you now on his quesiton "What if there is no self to improve?"
During one of the dark nights of the soul 6 years ago when I locked myself indoor for a week for self-inquiry, I accidentally listened to a talk by Alan Watts "What if there is no self to improve?" I remember the feeling of disorientation and liberation at the same time. "who am I?" "I can be anyone. I am no one".
3) What would you like me to call you? You can call me C.


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