Yes, there is some. :'( It's so aggravating. I woke up this morning certain self was gone and I had seen through the illusion of it into simply being in the world. I'm 100% sure it is mind created, but it doesn't "feel" that way this morning. *Adding this after I wrote everything else* --> It isn't right to say feel. It feels the same; yet the nagging doubt at your question.Is there any doubt?
Well, before we started this conversation, I was quite sure that you were correct. I had read some articles, your book, and a few dialogues on this site; I just hadn't felt it.Can you look back to before we started this conversation and tell me what else has changed?
What hasn’t changed? What looks different?
Yesterday, the entire day was freedom and perspective was different. It felt totally done. This literally looked different - even the internal landscape. This morning it's a bit harder and I feel some sort of push/pull inside. Looking makes me wonder if there is still some fear.
I don't know of what, though. I know that "I" is just a thought. "Me'" is just an idea pointing to a gathering of stuff that breathes, and sleeps, and talks, and types. Yesterday when I felt totally free, I was a better dad and husband than the day before in a sense; I just did what came naturally without getting in its way. I had conversations with neighbors that are normally awkward and didn't feel the slightest bit odd or uncomfortable, or overlay anything to do with a "me" being perceived by them (or me) into it.
It's too early to have had any interactions with anyone else where I live (Eastern Standard), but I feel some doubt, so the cascade of sorts above. :)
Felt it? Yes. Seen it? aaah. I get in my own way to some extent. "I" am not a thing. "I" isn't a thing any more than a french fry is a thing, in truth. It points to something people commonly understand, but it isn't itself the very thing.
My name, he, I, me, mine, his and all of that are the same; relative terms pointing to the perspective I have on this life living, or that of another being experiencing/referencing this being in this life. They aren't the life. The life is the life; even that is a descriptor for what's occurring.
Why should it be personal? The sensation when one settles some and observes typing just happening "without thinking" or sees the words appear on the page simultaneous to the no-thinking/typing/seeing/understanding it is so much clearer how impersonal the very essence is - impersonal; no I. No me.
Yet some doubt arises, which makes me wonder if I have truly SEEN or just have a fabulous conceptual understanding that sometimes masquerades as seeing. Yuck!