Thanks for telling me how it's going for you.
It's good to notice that you haven't been fully looking into these things.. As always I can never find this entity. but it's more clear to me from here that there's areas I'm not fully looking into and they do have to do with control. I'm maybe being a little hypocritical in that there's a an interest in investigating it but also hesitation in doing so. After all when I say there's a lot of weight being put on this "controller" idea, there's reason for doing so. It's a defense, a way to find a sort of hope in tough times. Where I can tell myself if "I" do the right thing in the right way I'll be able to defend against pain and suffering.
It's very good to acknowledge this. And there are easy things we can do to calm this, if necessary.. So yes, definitely there's some anxiety and hesitation going on.
My impression is that you have already begun to look more deeply? So bravo! But please keep aware of any anxiety or hesitation when it appears, if it seems to affect willingness to look, and let me know?
Yes, of course. And it's relaxing that's necessary sometimes in order to simply look. Something feels threatened, there's an impulse to protect. This defense instinct is very loyal, motivated by love/fear.. Sensible thing would be to look, wouldn't be able to relax without making sure to find out. That's kinda what has led me to this really.
The confusion is that nobody is actually in danger. In fact, there never was a' self' that could be 'harmed'. It's a ridiculous analogy perhaps but it's a bit like the loyal doggie that attacks the hoover. It's not necessary. The hoover isn't being used to kill someone.
Try thanking the anxiety for its loyal protection, that it has done a wonderful job all these years but it can relax now because nobody is in danger. See if that helps?
Very good. Excellent work Liam.. Attempts to look are triggering those moments of understanding more frequently and looking at them I'm seeing the sudden reaction that takes place after where the old assumed understanding is quickly put in, but I'm seeing it happen now and taking the opportunities to notice it every time and notice the reactions around it.
This is all that's necessary really.
Please let me know how it goes?
Alll the best