Search found 113 matches

by Alexey Manukhov
Wed Aug 15, 2012 2:47 pm
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

Re: And again for Ilona

I couldn't catch this question for a long time - simply fall asleep or walked without any thoughts. Then the insight has come that label "I" tends not to one goal, but to the complex of phenomenons that I automatically connect with me. It could be point of view, shape of the body, achivements in dif...
by Alexey Manukhov
Wed Aug 15, 2012 9:22 am
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

Re: And again for Ilona

As for the table and unicorn... When I talk about them, I make some mental pictures in both cases, that are not connected to the reality. As long as I'm thinking and talking about table, I'm becoming farther from the real table. So, I can say that labels don't point to something real. They are situa...
by Alexey Manukhov
Wed Aug 15, 2012 8:51 am
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

Re: And again for Ilona

While I've been looking to my mind, I've seen some interesting things. For example, I ascertained that all thoughts about future are hallucinations, that are made of memories. When I make plans, I loose this moment. I recognised the shift between these two states. It's like an awakening from a night...
by Alexey Manukhov
Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:15 pm
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

Re: And again for Ilona

When I try to investigate I, it becomes foggy, eely. Only this moment remains real and all thoughts disappear very fast. And sleepy state comes very often, or boredom, or waiting for some new state. And the feeling "I" turns into the list of memories, achievements, likes and dislikes after the focus...
by Alexey Manukhov
Tue Aug 14, 2012 4:31 pm
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

Re: And again for Ilona

It's a very strange experience, like a phantom pain. I feel that me is an illusion, but it turns on some strong states and passions to show that it's real. When I see illusority of I, some sort of calmness comes and all plans and other thoughts finish. It's like waves. I tried to feel that the idea ...
by Alexey Manukhov
Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:34 am
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

Re: And again for Ilona

I think that after the awakening I won't be afraid of loosing time, of opinions of other people about me, of future plans, of contradiction of me and my expectation about myself.
by Alexey Manukhov
Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:12 am
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

Re: And again for Ilona

Well... I'm waiting for some new state of mind, for the insight, for finishing of my endless thoughts about myself and my problems. I think, seeing from the position of no self is the position of freedom and unpredictability. When I'm in this state, I'm not determined by my past, there are no though...
by Alexey Manukhov
Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:06 pm
Forum: ARCHIVES
Topic: And again for Ilona
Replies: 73
Views: 6545

And again for Ilona

I've read and practiced a lot, but I feel that I haven't changed radically yet. My mind is with me and it's too strong. I see that thougths and concepts from zen and advaita more interrupt than help me, because they became a mental knowledge for me. I can reply to many serious questions using, for e...

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