You are trying to change what is being experienced in the body, as sensations, as if it can be changed. That is the suffering.

The feeling is bad, it hurts, it doesn't say anything.

Underneath the label ‘bad’ what is it exactly? Specifically.

Where does it arise? Don’t give me philosophy or ...

Hi send before writing what I intended about how well not you is not doing 😂😂😂😂
But shhhh don’t let it go to your illusion of me who doesn’t exist and never existed…


Nowhere to be found a doing or doer, just "preexisting condition" (that is too formal to hit the nail on the head by the way. Just ...

There's something interpreted as a "controller". A tension that feels personal.

Does the tension itself say “I am a person”?
…or does thought say that ABOUT the tension?

Is the hugging, and/or the compassion a doing? Or is it what remains in the absence of a chooser, a controller and a separate self?

Is there anyone here to ‘go through this’?
To fight?

I wonder if all tension is a resistance to look and an assumption.

Find out :)

I feel like I'm barely able to differentiate the questions you ask here. It's all just resolving here and investigating

Yep. words words words…

Is seeking present?

Very good.

There is nothing physical there

Exactly. This is critical seeing. What you describe is not a self. It is a recurring perceptual/conceptual pattern. A thought immediately tries to convert a sensation into a location of identity.
“This is where I am looking from.”
“The quiet side is ...

I guess I am still looking for a thing like a 'me' that all the sensations are appearing to. Like I can't accept that it is just nothing behind it all.

Haha, the ‘I’ will never accept not being the center of all things. In control of all things.

But experientially the world does not arrive with ...

One one hand, no answer or not answer is really there, thought makes everything into something and the song goes on.

Yes precisely. Who owns that thought?
Who generates that thought?
Who is responsible for that thought?

Is there a joke to get? What is the expectation?


❤️

What is “self-compassion” in direct experience?

There’s a huge difference between compulsive pleasure-seeking to escape discomfort and no longer worshipping suffering. :)

Is it possible to feel good all the time?


It feels so clear that someone was making a choice, and then it’s not findable the ...

Great.

The important thing is not whether “something shifted” (and as a side note it is far better to sit inside uncertainty than claim certainty about any of this.) What matters is the stories are being seen as stories.

So that resistance is the apparent self. Now look under the hood at the ...

Very good, Somerton. A lot seen here. And also some to work with. :)


There is exclusive coupling of what I am calling ‘needs’ with a physical entity.


Right now, in immediate experience, where is the “physical entity” apart from sensation + image + thought-label?
(Not the idea, memory, or ...

thought: "but what do I do with this?"
> Is that knowable?
it feels like absence of an answer comes as an answer. Bit hard to describe, words like spacious or empty might fit as well.


Is this the same as when searching for self? The absence points to the answer…


Heart, transforms to neck-vein ...

❤️

This is really excellent looking Grant, very precise. Extra credit for ‘humiliated.’ This is exactly how beliefs naturally surface to be seen and exposed.

Keep returning to the body in this way especially with what we could call charged events or moments and notice the mismatch between thought or ...

Self-compassion feels selfish or dangerous, like I’d be letting other things go just to feel better.

This is curious.

By ‘feels’ is it in the body or in thought?
Which is speaking?

is there an actual danger present right now?

That pull toward “feels good = dangerous”
and “suffering = safe ...