Erfahrungsberichte

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Having been a serious seeker myself, I hope to share my experience on how to stop the seeking addiction, hope this can be helpful for some. ????

In summary, I have been seeking for 6 years and reading over 500 books but it led me only to temporary blissful/peaceful experiences which kept the seeking addiction going stronger and stronger. Then I found out about Liberation Unleashed and BAM!, seeing that self is just a thought/story and doesn’t exist in reality stopped the addiction.

Thanks to Ilona for being there for me, guiding me, slaying my thoughts after thoughts. I call her the thought slayer. You see (focus, look hard til headache and then relax, just effortless noticing), somewhere in between, you see that there is no I, you never existed! All non-dual teachings have been saying find out who you are, you are existence, you are awareness but you don’t exist, there is no you in whatever form or shape! No wonder you never stop seeking – you have been trying to find a self that doesn’t exist. Stop all your seeking, start posting at Liberation Unleashed forum. It’s free and you have nothing to lose except the illusion of self.

My story (for those who are interested to continue reading)
I have been seeking for almost 6 years, reading about 2-3 hours daily about enlightenment, non-duality. I have accumulated over 500 books from Adyashanti, Bob (Sailor) Adamson, Charlie Hayes, David Godman, Eckhart Tolle, Francis Lucille, Greg Goode, Gangaji, Gilbert Schultz, John Wheeler, Katie Davis, Leo Hartog, Michael Langford, Nisargadatta Maharaj, Papaji, Ramana Maharshi, Steven Wingate, etc… Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against them, it’s just that their methods are not direct enough (at least for me). Every quarter, I looked at Amazon.com’s Listmania! List of Top 10-30 non-dual books recommended by users and collect all of them. Every book review that says "This is it!" and I’ll buy it.

My hobby is reading non-dual books on lazy Sunday (especially when raining outside), occasionally, there are some blissful/peaceful experiences, wowwww, niceeeee, sweeettttt. Then it disappears followed by disappointment and despair, then more reading and seeking – a vicious cycle! Reading how to live life when life is waiting for you to live it! All these led me to nowhere, why? Because there is no one!! You don’t exist!!

Tips I think maybe helpful for someone new to Liberation Unleashed Inquiry
1. If you are stuck, look at the Start Page on Ilona’s blog
http://markedeternal.blogspot.com/p/start-here.html

2. Everyone say look, just look. This is the most frustrating point to me. Of course I am looking you fool!!! But I am not seeing it!!! Like someone ask you to hear, you want to slap him (sorry) and say of course I am hearing. In my humble experience, it is a matter of auto-focusing like the camera, you need to focus really hard until you have a headache and then relax until effortless noticing (like seeing your nose). Somewhere in between, you will have glimpse of what they meant by look, there is no self.

2. If you look at the posts, you see people are asked to just notice the experience, see the thoughts, see how the story of self arises. Then BAM!, the person passes through the gate. Sometimes, even when there are no exchanges/messages in a few days. Now that also frustrates me a lot – how does he goes from strong belief in self, no messages/exhanges in between, then BAM!, he says he sees no self. It’s like the conversation has no logical progression or not making any progress but suddenly it clicks! I was thinking how can that dude sees it so easily when it took me weeks and no progress – am I an idiot or what?? But believe me, once the seed of "seeing" is implanted, give it time to run its course, the anti-virus program is running in the background killing the self slowly. For some, it may take 10 minutes chat in Facebook (I know curse those lucky jerks), some may take 2 months. Let it slide gradually, don’t lose hope. For me, it takes about a month with 25 days showing no progress (in logical thinking), then suddenly within 5 days, BAM!, all starts to sink in.

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